Twin Disasters Verses the Assassin's Creed
by WereCat the Assassino
Summary: WereCat, Alex, and Kattie our back with a new friend, Sean, in the world of Assassin's Creed. It's all Alex's fault! She just had to steal from WereCat! Spoilers, so far, for Assassin's Creed 2. Chapter 2 is up!
1. Prolouge

**This is my latest muse. As you can see, I went through a story purge of the stories I plan to keep on hold for a long, long while. Anyway, lately I've been playing Altair's Chronicles and Assassin's Creed 2 (long story) and decided that, "HEY! My friends Kattie, Alex, Asian (he calls himself that, no idea why he insists) and I could go to Renaissance Italy and kick some butt!" Then came the problem that our powers are rather annoying at times, so we have basically no problems in anything. Then came this; I didn't put humor down as a genre, because it's more of an adventure, despite the fact that those three are the most hilarious friends a girl could have! Any humor is just there.**

**WereCat: Finally! I'm updating something! How about…. Eeny, meeny, miny-**

**Asian: I WANT TO SAY IT!**

**WereCat: *startled* Okay… Go ahead Asian.**

**Asian: WereCat the Assassino doesn't own Assassin's Creed 2 or Big Bang Theory. She does, in fact, own a Xbox 360, but not the company that makes it. Hey I just realized! You changed your username for this didn't you?**

**WereCat: *grins* Yup.**

…**..**

"Come on Alex! You've been playing that all day!" whined WereCat. It was true, she had been on it all day. Earlier that day in the outpost the four friends called "home", Alex had found that she was bored and decided that it was as a good time as any to raid WereCat's closet since she was out hunting (or order pizza). Inside that (very messy)place, she found a bag labeled "WereCat's Videogame Bag". Excited, she rummaged through till she found **the Game**. It was in pristine condition, despite the fact WereCat played it all the time. Not a single scratch, the cover was perfect.

Smiling, she inserted the disc into the console, Xbox 360 to be exact, and the smile broadened as the opening credits played after she selected story mode.

"My name is Desmond Miles. I'm a prisoner of war, a war I never knew existed, waged by two groups I never thought were real. Templars and Assassins. The Animus showed me the Truth. The things I've seen, the things I've been. A thousand years of history flowing through my veins brought to life by this machine. They're using me, using me to search for something. They call it the "Apple". It's an artifact, one of many so called, "Pieces of Eden". The Templars collect them, it's how the stay in power. If the Templars get their hands on another one of them, everything will change!

"They want to make all of us their slaves! When they first brought me here, I was afraid of what would happen if I fought back. Now, huh, now I'm afraid of what will happen if I don't. But I can't do it alone… and maybe I don't have to. I've met someone, her name is Lucy. I think she's on my side. She's gone now, taken away by that jerk, Warren Vidic, and his Templar masters. I don't know what will happen tomorrow, or what will happen to me! All I know is that I need to get out of here! I need to do it soon. My name is Desmond Miles, and this is my story."

Alex squealed with delight as she took out a guard from behind. "TAKE THAT TEMPLAR!" The "end of memory sequence" was on the screen. "WOOOOO!" Kattie smirked at WereCat behind Alex's back. She had just one a game of "rock, paper, scissors, lizard, Spock" against WereCat for the next turn. "Why can't I play? It's my game!" WereCat whined, again. Kattie rolled her eyes. "That's what you get for picking lizard!" Kattie turned back toward the TV, smirking happily, as WereCat muttered about "not understanding the rules".

Suddenly, the game froze up. "What the heck is this?" yelled Alex. She ran over to the console.

"Maybe it overheated?" suggested Kattie.

The door banged open loudly as a tannish, black-haired boy of Chinese looking descent came in. "The awesome one is home, ladies!" he yelled as he walked in. "Asian!" they yelled and ran to hug their friend. "I have the sodas for our fridge! What have you guys been doing?" he asked.

"Playing a stupid game!" Alex huffed and kicked the Xbox for effect. (Sorry, couldn't help it.)

Suddenly, the room burst with white light, temporarily blinding the four friends.


	2. In the Beginning

**So here were on to the second chapter. I've been consulting my friends about this chapter to see their ideas and, well this came from it. Anywho, let's just enjoy this story as much as we can. All flamers will be burned with their own flaming stuff. Understand?**

**WereCat: *yawn* I am beat. Who wants to say disclaimer today?**

**Alex: Not me.**

**Kattie: Not me.**

**Asian: I said it last chapter!**

**WereCat: No other characters have been introduced yet!**

**Asian, Kattie, and Alex: *stare***

**WereCat: Fine! I only surrendered because I am so tired. Got it?**

**Asian: Sure.**

**Kattie: Whatever you say.**

**Alex: *laugh***

**WereCat: *yawn* Stupid yawn… I don't own Assassin's Creed 2, even if I wish for it on a regular basis. Ubisoft does. I wonder if they'd be willing to sell….**

…**.**

**-Alex POV-**

Alex blinked her eyes as she awoke in a strange looking place in a cart of flowers. She squealed. "Yay! Now I get to smell like flower petals! How wonderful!" Of course, she didn't see the creepy-looking woman standing a few feet away. "_Buon'giorno_ child! What are you doing in the flower cart?" The woman was tall with dark, shifty looking eyes wearing a strange red head covering with a dress that wasn't the most appropriate thing. Alex narrowed her eyes, feeling slightly uncomfortable with this woman staring at her.

"I want to smell nice! What does it look like?" Alex practically shouted. The woman just laughed. You have nothing to fear from me, child. My name is Paola. And yours is?"

"Juliet!" Alex blurted.

Paola smiled. "What a peculiar name! May I ask again, why are you in the flower cart? Smelling nice isn't exactly a good enough reason to make all the guards stare at you. No offense, but you look rather suspicious."

Alex rolled her eyes. "I don't know why I'm here, but I must ask, did you happen to see anyone around me. Two girls and a boy, perhaps a little younger than me…?"

Paola shook her head. "No, I'm sorry, I havn't. While you wait for then though, you could come and stay with my girls at the _bordello_- "

"WHAT!" screamed Alex.

Paola quickly made a gesture of peace. "Not that way, not that way at all! All I'm asking is if we could aid you in finding your friends. I wouldn't make you do anything you didn't want to do. You would be perfectly safe and comfortable. Maybe you could even help with some chores, running a _bordello_ is a lot of work you know."

Alex tapped her chin, looking thoughtful. "You promise I don't have to do anything I don't want to?"

Paola smiled. "Promise."

Alex sighed. "I guess I could come, as long as my privacy is respected by all 'customers' and members of the staff."

Paola gave an amused smile. "If you come to any harm, they will pay with their lives."

Alex smiled. "Thank you."

They began to walk down the street toward a brightly colored building decorated with roses. Then Alex remembered something vital in all their adventures.

"I forgot to ask! Where am I and what year is it?"

Paola shot Alex a confused look. "Why that's a silly thing to ask."

Alex gave her best puppy face. "Please, it's really important!"

Paola looked genuinely amused. "I'll tell you if you stop making that silly face of yours!" Alex stopped. "Alright, I still don't understand why you're asking, but might as well refrain from arguing. I'm already convinced you crazy. We're in _Firenze, Italia_ and the year is 1476 _in the year of our Lord_. Now let's get you out of those strange clothes!"

**-Asian POV-**

Asian gently pulled himself up out of the river near the city wall. The river prevented people from invading, since most didn't know how to swim, so the city was confident that it would protect them from soldiers and other more unsavory characters. Asian had no idea how he got in the river in the first place, only that he was there. So after he got out, he quickly scaled the city wall and made an effort to take a nice deep breath. He hadn't had one since he got out of the river and scaling a wall when you're wet, cold, and hungry can really make some tired.

Speaking of being hungry, a baker's shop was nearby and Asian, unfortunately, had no money. He promptly shrugged. Since when did he care if stealing food was wrong? ((Bad Asian!)) He went over and, just as the Baker looked away, snatched a loaf of bread. Poor Asian. He did not see that the Baker had an apprentice who just happened to see him stealing. "_Al ladro!_ Guards! Take him away!" Asian looked over his shoulder, bread half-way towards his mouth, to see at least seven guards tailing him.

Unconcerned, he ran to the roofs where he planned to find a nice hidey-hole and wipe all the guards memories. That is where things started to mess up for Asian. He was up on the roof in a garden, contemplating whether he should give them a 'happy' memory or a 'sad' memory. As he did this, the guards snuck up on him and yanked him out of the roof garden. Calm as ever. Asian concentrated and attempted to enter the minds of his captors. Nothing happened.

He tried again. Nothing happened. "Third time's the charm!" he whispered and tried yet again. Still nothing. The guards stared at him before taking some weird version of handcuffs (shackles) and applying them to his wrists and ankles. "_Ti arresto_, by the decree of Lorenzo de Medici. Do not attempt escape, for the guards of _Firenze_ will find you." Asian shot the youngest guard, who was only a few years older than him, a curious look. The guard shrugged sheepishly, obviously embarrassed by the guard who was making the exchange.

"This day seems oddly interesting, despite the fact I'm being arrested."

**-WereCat POV-**

WereCat woke up on a bench. Shaking her head groggily from side to side, she attempted to focus on something brightly colored and strange, like she always did when she was confused. Nothing came to mind or in sight. That is, until a strange blonde-haired, blue-eyed, vibrant man walked right in front of her. "Come quickly! This is of the utmost importance!" he practically yelled. Quickly the man grabbed WereCat's hand and began dragging her down the street. Confused and slightly annoyed, she had to deal with the fact that for some reason, she was being dragged down the street by someone who she didn't know.

He led her over to a strange little workshop. Inside were tons of half-finished portraits, notebooks, and even a sculpture. "So what is the matter of utmost importance?" WereCat asked, attempting to sound nonchalant. The vibrant man smiled sheepishly. "Ah, well, you see, I am doing a portrait for Signora Auditore and I need someone to help me organize the shop and the paintings."

WereCat was confused. "So you picked a random girl off the street to help you?

The man shook his head. "No. I was looking for someone special, and when I looked over to the bench, you simply appeared there, and no one noticed a thing!"

"O-okay? So you want me to help you?"

"Exactly! I need someone special to care for my paintings! Someone who might understand how much they mean to me…"

"And you think I could do it?"

"_Si, piccina!_ I do."

"Um… but I don't know how to care for paintings."

"_No preoccuparvi piccina!_ I will teach you!"

"Okay then. I'll do it!"

"_Bene!_ Come with me." The man walked over to what looked storage room and smiled. "This is where I keep all my paintings. It is very important that they each get their own nook. _Capito_?" It had cubby holes on the walls, small enough to fit maybe one hundred in the room but widely spaced enough so that the paintings didn't stick together and smear. WereCat was even more surprised when she realized she understood even the strangely worded Italian.

She almost face palmed right then and there in front of the strange man who took her in. Obviously, when Alex kicked the Xbox it transported them to the game. Or at least partway into it. She glanced around. Nope. There was no mystical/magical glowy thingy that could possibly be Desmond Miles and there were no Lucy, Rebecca, Shaun, or (so help me, I hope not) Dr. Vidic. She shook her head. Was this seriously for real?

She shrugged. If it was, then obviously she and the others were transported to the most important characters at the beginning of the game. Who was she with then? There was a little sparky-spark of a light bulb in the back of her mind. _'Could it be?' _she thought. Only one way to find out. "_Si, Ser_- uh- I just realized I didn't catch your name." WereCat said slowly.

The man's face brightened. "I just realized the same thing, _piccina_! Hopefully, I may receive the name of my guest first…"

WereCat scanned her mind for a possible name. "Uh…Terra. Like the earth."

The man smiled. "What a beautiful name, Terra. Now I should probably keep my end." WereCat's suspicions were confirmed with next words.

"Well, Terra, my name is Leonardo da Vinci."

**-Kattie POV-**

Kattie ended up in probably the worst place possible. A smelly, dirty haystack right near an area that was already under much scrutiny from the guards and if she suddenly appeared, there would most definitely have been more. She observed the area for a moment and realized that, a little ways away, two differently dressed groups of guards were arguing severely. The ones wearing black and red stripes with little red beret-like hats were attacking a woman passing by. The ones wearing bronze and gold were obviously trying to defend the woman, but it was apparent that they held very little power here.

Suddenly, a man dressed like the black and red ones (except he had a black feather coming out of his hat) ran towards them. The groups stopped fighting momentarily. The "Feather" man whispered something nervously in the leader's ear, who turned and started yelling at the others to follow him. Kattie looked curiously at the other group's confused reaction.

"Interesting, isn't it? Shall we see were the _Pazzi_ are going?"

Kattie spun around, startled, to see an amused looking man of about twenty years of age, smirking outside the haystack. She backed away warily, waiting for him to move. He laughed. "You have nothing to fear from me, _bella_. I only thought that it was strange to see a young woman crouching down in a haystack. He seemed friendly and good natured.

"My name is Federico Auditore."

That is what got Kattie to trust him. She had watched WereCat play Assassin's Creed enough to know she could trust Federico. Instantly she felt a pang of sadness as she thought about Federico's fate.

"My name is Kay," she commented, trying to keep a straight face. She knew Kay wasn't the most feminine or beautiful name, but I would do its job. Federico shook her hand. "_Molto onorato_, Kay. I must say, would you be okay with helping me find _fratellino mio_? I heard a rumor he was going to get it a fight with the _Pazzi_, and I would prefer it if he didn't hurt himself.

Kattie, knowing exactly who he was talking about, smiled broadly. "Sure, I'd love to help. After all, you somewhat helped me. Otherwise I would still be stuck in this haystack."

"_Grazie_," he said as he lifted her out of the cart. "Now let us look!" They walked for quite a while, exchanging pleasantries the entire time. Kattie found that she truly enjoyed Federico's company and felt that pang of sadness again. According to the plotline, they did not have much time at all to joke around. Kattie heard shouting and cheers in the distance. She smiled.

'_That's definitely Ezio.'_

**_definitions_**

_**Grazie- **_**Thank you**

_**Fratellino mio- **_**My little brother**

_**Molto onorato- **_**Very honored**

_**Bella- **_**Beautiful**

_**Piccina- **_**Little one**

_**Si- **_**Yes**

_**Ser- **_**Sir**

_**Bene- **_**Good**

_**No preoccuparvi-**_** Don't worry, not to worry**

_**Capito?- **_**Understand?**

_**Firenze-**_**Florence**

_**Ti arresto- **_**I arrest you**

_**Al ladro- **_**A thief**

_**Italia-**_** Italy**

_**Bordello-**_** Brothel**

_**Buon' giorno- **_**Good morning, good day**


	3. Adjusting with Dinner and a Show

**Next chapter. Anyway, I'm really excited about this story. It's just too fun. And in case of those who may wonder, I will put the modern assassins' reaction to our friends every little while or so. But only after they meet up with Ezio and co. Otherwise it'll be just the ones they've met.**

**WereCat: Next contestant! Me and Asian are off-limits so one of you guys get to go!**

**Kattie: Wha-?**

**Alex: I'll do it!**

**Everyone else: Le gasp!**

**Alex: Oh yeah! I said it!**

**WereCat: Okay….**

**Alex: WereCat the Assassino doesn't own Assassin's Creed, even though I saw it on her last Christmas list.**

**WereCat: A girl can dream!**

…**..**

**-Kattie's POV-**

Kattie peeked around Federico's head at the sight before her. First thing she noticed was the growing number of red and black guards from earlier that were gathering on the far side of the bridge-like thing. The second thing she noticed was, of course, the infamous teenaged Ezio Auditore da Firenze. He was exactly like he was in the game, only less animated. Tan skin, brown hair in a teeny pony, brown eyes, with a confident smirk on his face. He was wearing brownish trousers and a faded white poofy shirt with an embroidered blue vest over it.

Currently he was "pumping up the crowd" so to speak. The teenage guys around him were yelling their approval and it was sort of, well…. barbaric almost. Just kidding! Anyway, Kattie saw a person come out of the other crowd. He was pale, short, and skinny. There was an unpleasant air about him, but that could've just been the smell. His straight, black hair was about chin length and he wore a sort of pinstriped hat that just made you want to steal it. He had a tunic of the same pattern and (heheh) what looked like white tights.

The new guy's beady black eyes scanned the crowd and he began yelling at the group in rapid Italian. Kathryne smiled and shook her head sadly at the one and only Vieri de Pazzi, the most annoying person in all of Italia. Ezio fired back and soon they were both insulting each other, until Vieri had had enough and threw a rock at Ezio. Then the chaos ensued and Ezio ended up with a cut lip. The poor guy was so angry and began punching everything in sight. Kattie smiled and hung back with Federico, watching with amusement the "Pazzi" getting beat up. Finally Federico stepped up to Ezio, who immediately panicked at the sight of his brother.

"Fe-Federico! What are you doing here?" Ezio sputtered.

Federico smirked at his brother, "I wanted to see if baby brother had finally learned how to fight!"

"And?" Ezio asked.

"You have style, but endurance is what counts!" Federico said cheerfully. "Let's see how many you can ruin before they get the best of you!" The fighting continued, this time Kattie and Federico joined in. They all made short work of the rest of the Pazzi guards and soon discovered that Vieri had fled during the fighting. "_Codardo!"_ yelled Ezio. Finally he noticed me and a smirk came upon his still bleeding lips. "Ah, Federico! Who is this?" he asked. Federico rolled his eyes. "This is Kay. I found her sitting in a haystack watching the Pazzi."

Ezio lifted an eyebrow. "Federico…. I know it isn't my place to judge, but isn't she a little young for you?"

Kattie almost choked when she heard this and the boys gave her inquisitive looks. Federico frowned slightly. "It isn't like that Ezio. I just think she could use a place to stay since she obviously isn't from around here," he said, glancing at her clothes. Ezio waved him off. "No need to be angry brother! I was only teasing you!"

Federico's nonchalant smile returned as he said, "Well let's take care of your lip shall we? We don't want it to mar your good looks!" Ezio rolled his eyes and he and Kattie began looting the bodies, Federico standing there and watching them work. Finally, they had enough money (with about 500 florins extra for Kattie to spend) and walked over to a doctor. "Ah! _Fratelli Auditore! _Why am I not surprised?" They easily got Ezio fixed up, but not after begging the doctor. ("Please _ser_! My brother's pretty face is his only asset!") Then the race began. Ezio climbed with great ease to the roof of the church and waited, calling insults down to his brother.

Meanwhile, Federico was actually helping Kattie by pushing her up to the roof and showing her what to use as foot and handholds. Soon the two were running on the sliding shingles, desperately trying not to cause them to hit innocents below. They finally reached Ezio and Federico decided to go all the way to the top of the tower! The two were already at the top, by the time Kattie got there. "It is a good life we lead, brother," Federico said, sort of man-hugging his brother.

"Ah! The best! May it never change," Ezio said.

"And may it never change us."

**-Modern Assassin POV-**

Desmond came to the familiar loading screen and frowned slightly in his sedated state. "What the heck? I saw this memory yesterday! What's going on?"

"Hold on Desmond! We don't know what's going on!" yelled Shaun through all the blue.

"It looks like some sort of virus, four of them to be exact. From what I can tell, they are all placed throughout Firenze. They all have strange and seemingly genetic make-up as their code," Rebecca said.

"So, basically, a virus has created four individuals and put them in different areas?" Desmond asked.

"Yes," replied Shaun, his usual snarky tone in his British accent lost. "The strange thing about it is that they all seem human, except for a few minor differences…"

"Such as?"

"Well the one you just met's entire genetic make-up is blurry, sort of. Kind of like it's shifting constantly. It can't even decide what kind of creature it is. Right now, it's defiantly a female human, but I have a feeling that that can easily change."

"Kind of like a shapeshifter on those B-movies?"

"Exactly like a shapeshifter."

**-WereCat's POV-**

WereCat finished brushing up the paintings and made sure to put them in order… again. She had been doing this all day and was getting fed up with placing painting after painting in each specific spot. Well, almost all day. Leonardo had decided earlier to get her some new clothes and they went to the market. The dress was a simple blue with some black ribbon on it and a blue bandana to cover her blue highlights. She had to admit, it did help that she was receiving aid from her employer/mentor. Surprisingly, Leonardo had agreed to take her up as a temporary apprentice.

Receiving a knock on his door, Leonardo motioned her to leave it and walked over. "Yes what is it?" A man strode in wearing a grand white robe. He sat down and looked over at the WereCat.

"Leonardo, who is this?" the man in white asked.

Leonardo put on his best reassuring smile and answered him. "This is Terra, my temporary apprentice. She is currently helping me organize my paintings. The man in white gave Leonardo and pointed look. "Shouldn't she be getting home to her family?"

"I'm an orphan!" WereCat blurted out. "Part of the deal was that Leonardo takes care of me as my guardian." She didn't think the man in white would believe her, but apparently the lie was convincing enough, because he relaxed and lowered his hood. WereCat nearly fell down anime style when she saw it was the one and only Giovanni Auditore. He glared at her. "I trust you will not reveal my secret?" WereCat hastily shook her head. He sighed and glanced over to Leonardo. "My son got into a fight again! It took all of my effort to finish off the Pazzi that fought him except for that idiota Vieri!"

Leonardo placed a comforting hand on Giovanni's shoulder. "It's alright Giovanni! I'm sure your son will be alright. He just needs to learn to have some responsibility, that's all."

Giovanni shook his head. "He acts the exact way I did when I was that age!"Leonardo gave his trademark friendly smile and patted the upset man's shoulder. "Come on! Didn't we all at one point?"Giovanni sighed. "I suppose so!" He glanced outside and into the waning daylight. The sky was already a dark gray. "I better leave, Leonardo, but I must get what I came for. Are they safe?" Leonardo turned around and handed him the strange box he was given to protect. "Here you are, Giovanni! Don't worry, I Didn't peek!" Giovanni tucked the box under his arm and looked at Leonardo. "Goodbye, _amico mio_! Protect your little one!"

With that, he left, leaving Leonardo with WereCat. "Terra?" he said.

WereCat looked up at him, "Yes, Leonardo?"

He smiled. "You may stop for tonight; it's high time we had dinner." Together, they picked up the paintings and set the table. Leonardo smiled awkwardly at her. "Um… Would you happen to know how to cook?" WereCat sighed and pulled out a pan. "Actually, yes. I do, but I'm not that good." She proceeded to roast a chicken like her mother taught her, but it ended up burning and WereCat thought, not for the first time, how much easier it was to eat raw mice. She eyed the chicken disdainfully, even if Leonardo insisted it was delightful.

**-Alex's POV-**

Alex looked down at herself. She was wearing a neat black dress with a white tie. It had a simple elegancy to it, so that even though it had no embroidery on it, it could be still counted as beautiful. Apparently Madonna Paola thought so too. "Bella! Bella Juliet! Girls! Come see what we've done with our new assistant." She ushered some of the courtesans over to Alex and they all gave exclamations of happiness. One, in a silky red dress inquired, "Is she going to be joining us in our endeavors, Madonna Paola?" Paola shook her head. "No, I'm sorry, but she is not here for that. Don't be shy about teaching her to blend and pickpocket though! _Dio mio_, she'll need those skills!"

The red courtesan and a couple of her friends took Alex's hands and led me out to the courtyard. They showed me how to walk among a group of people and that the guards wouldn't notice her. No offense to the guards or anything, but they're idiots. Alex looks nothing like the people around her! She sighed and sat on a bench while the courtesans demonstrated how to pickpocket people. Once they came back, Alex stepped up behind a group of people and snatched the coins she saw (about 250 florins), then ran over to another group and waited. The process was repeated until the guards left her alone. She smirked and walked back to the brothel.

Paola smiled and hugged Alex when she received news of her success. Alex smiled and held out her small bundle to Paola proudly; glad she was contributing to this little society of thrown down and out women. Paola smiled at Alex in return. "No, my dear, this was your catch! Keep the money and buy yourself some trinkets during your stay. Maybe one day you'll put these skills to use with my girls or perhaps earning money on your own!" Alex nodded politely and tucked the little sack in her boot. Surprisingly, she didn't notice the bundle was even there till she shook the shoe so hard it hit her toe. The girls laughed and Paola shook her head in amusement.

Then, Paola abruptly turned about and clapped her hands quickly, twice. "Dinner, girls!" she yelled and they all filed into the kitchen to be handed a hearty stew and bread. They all chowed down on the food which had a tangy flavor Alex couldn't quite describe. The texture of the meat in the broth was stringy and was revealed by the girl in red to be pork. Alex was so happy, she almost forgot that she wasn't from Italy, especially not in the fifteenth century.

**-Asian POV-**

Asian, unlike his friends, was not having a grand time in the least. All he did was sit around, listening to lame jokes from the guards that he didn't even understand, let alone repeat! Finally, when dinner came, he had something to do. He was so hungry he practically swallowed the small ration of bread and water whole!


End file.
